On Friendship

Lynn Cooper

Senior Associate University Chaplain and Director of Catholic Life

In the upper shelf of the Interfaith Center kitchen, a green and pink floral ceramic cup towers above the rest of the mugs. This cup was a gift to me from my friend Rabbit back in 2012. Rabbit and I had a lot of friends in common, but we really did not know each other very well. We traded numbers one night at a party and quickly made plans to spend an afternoon together on our days off. At the time, I had just settled into a new apartment in Cambridge. I was supposed to have moved in six months earlier, but due to a series of delays and errors, I had only just gotten my keys. Suffice to say, it was a profound relief to finally be unpacked and connecting with the neighborhood.

On that September afternoon, I met up with Rabbit in Central Square and we walked down to the Charles. We were both in major life transitions. We had little history as friends, but we connected deeply with one another, navigating those bumpy bricks and talking for hours. Before we parted ways, she reached into her backpack and placed in my hands a little bag with a bow on it. I sorted through layers of tissue paper and slowly unwrapped the treasure within: the green and pink floral ceramic cup. I was so surprised by this unexpected gift! It was beautiful and delicate. It was something I would have never bought for myself but that I instantly felt a tenderness toward.

I was so moved by this gesture, and I asked Rabbit about it. She told me that she wanted to help celebrate and mark this new season of my life. And then, right there on the sidewalk, she starting chanting, “New era, new era, new era!”

Through two moves and years of life and work, this cup has remained. It once bore a green silicon lid and green ribbed sleeve, but those accessories have been lost to time and circumstance. At some point, I must have taken the cup with me to work and simply left it here. For a long time now, it has been fixture in our tea and hospitality ministry. I have heard students comment on how beautiful and unique it is. I delight in those comments. Each time I see the cup, I do not just think of Rabbit, I feel the warmth and care of her friendship pouring through the present moment. I marvel at how students who were only a few years old in 2012 now use it and enjoy it, bringing to new life this gift of kind-heartedness and comfort.

That afternoon was the first and last time Rabbit and I hung out.  Our lives and social circles diverged as often happens. Nevertheless, I still feel a deep connection to her and to the joy and wonder we shared that day. Friendship takes many shapes throughout our lives and sometimes those connections are fleeting but they are no less true, no less important.

This week, I invite you to pause for a moment and reflect on the friendships in your life. You might think about reaching out, sending a text message, placing a phone call, or tossing out some other arrow of love. Or maybe you want to simply give thanks for someone like Rabbit—someone whose presence in your life was brief but meaningful. However you spend your reflection time, may it fill your cup.